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Week One: |
Spring is Springing Up!
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the cosmos are just
emerging from the
ground |
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The shrub out back is really turning
green now, while the crepe myrtle has really taken hold. With lovely
bluish flowers blooming, new tendrils are reaching out from the
patch this year. I'm hoping to eventually strip the grass from this
hill and transplant more myrtle from a patch that DO no longer
wants. |
The picture below is from
out back where the mint, Asiatic daylilies, and morning glories are
beginning to take hold. If you MouseOver the left side of the
picture, you'll see a CloseUp of the mint; while MousingOver the
right side of the picture will show you a CloseUp of the starting of
the flowering vines. |
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DO's walking has greatly
improved through the last few weeks, and her walker and even her
cane have been left unused in the corner now. When I took her to
the doctor recently, she received an excellent report and is hoping
to get back to driving in the near future. Since she hasn't been
driving lately, poor Rosita hasn't been on a ride for several months
- until Jim and I took her out one afternoon!  |
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I took several pictures
but didn't get a really good one of Jim and Rosita; but, as some of
you know, that didn't stop me for long. With a little editing, I
took the two pictures on the right and created the one of the left,
so that I had them both looking at the camera, smiling, at the same
time. |
Help save reigningpages.com
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I hope you remember
last month when I mentioned how the recent cutback in my Social
Security disability check has come at nearly the same time as the
renewal for both my domain name and the web host ($150). So now I'm looking at losing the domain space and my domain name (reigningpages.com) as of May 23rd.
No sooner had my request gone out for some help than YOU answered!
My first "Thank You" needs to go out to Loretta,
Jackie, Jim and DO who pitched in and quickly brought the total up to $60. I knew that
if my friends only helped a bit it would take no time to reach the
goal.
Thank You so much, the fund to save my domain is nearly
halfway there! I know several others of you have promised to help
also. I thank you for your pledges and will update the Thank You's
and the total as I receive your contributions. |
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If you
have enjoyed my blog through the years and would like to contribute
anything to helping me keep my domain, please send contributions of
ANY amount to: |
ReigningPages
1200 14th St. NE
Canton, Oh 44705 |
Thank you for ANY help that you can offer!
The cost isn't too much, so even a few dollars will
bring me closer to the amount needed. I'll make sure to keep
you posted on how things go by raising the meter (as you can see
from the pictures to the left and right), along with a big Thank You notice to
everyone that contributes! 
(Checks and money orders can be made
out to either "ReigningPages" or "Michael Bivens") |
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Thank You to my First Contributors!
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Loretta Bryce,
owner of the
"Cottage Gate
Gift Shoppe" |
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Joyce Hancock,
one of my Ohio moms |
Jack Pickett,
childhood friend from my neighborhood in Charlotte |
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Jim Pollnow,
my partner in everything!  |
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Not much has really happened that I
could take pictures of for you to see (although I see some buds on
some of the irises, so there WILL be flower pictures online soon
), so instead, I'll just fill you in on some of the stuff that's
been happening that wasn't worth taking pictures of.  |
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I had my yearly case review with the
Dpt. of Human Services. I really hate having to deal with Welfare;
but it's through that department that I get my medical benefits.
After coughing up all the appropriate paperwork to prove my new even
lower level of poverty, my nice case worker did have some good news
for me. At this level, I'm automatically eligible for the medical
card. That means that when I fill my prescriptions now, I won't even
have to pay the $14 co-payment. WooHoo!  |
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In about two weeks, I'll
have another visit to my doctor, so of course that means I have
another trip to the hospital. Don't worry though, it's nothing
drastic, that's just were I have my blood work done. I
figure the doctor ought to have good news for me too. I've been
really good on keeping on top of taking my meds EVERY day. Even
though my doctor usually tells me that my liver enzymes,
cholesterol, etc. are all great, they should be even better now.
Why? Because being poorer lately surely has made me healthier. With
my lack of funds , I've cut my cigarette consumption down to about a
1/2 a pack a day and my daily intake of 2-liters of Coke has
dwindled down too; and with no working vehicle, I've been walking a
mile several times a week. At this rate, I should be as healthy as a
horse. Well, maybe not a horse, since I'm allergic to them; but I've got
to be pretty health regardless.  |
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I should probably explain
that a bit more, so that it makes a little more sense. I know I
shouldn't smoke; but through some of these past years and the
problems I've had, it's been, pretty much, my only vice. (We're all
entitled to at least one little character flaw, aren't we? )
Through the years, I tried to stop a couple of times. One of those
times, my house burned, and another time, one of my dogs died.
Neither incident was really conducive to being stress-free, so it
was quite easy to pick up the bad habit again each time. Two other
times I stopped for nearly a year because of bouts of pneumonia; but
when doctors tell you that you don't have much longer to live,
worrying about dying from cancer was always the last thing on my
mind. Lately, my plan of action has been not to ask to borrow any
cigarette money (I'll borrow to buy dog food though. ) The day I
have no cigarettes and no money is the the day I quit. By slowing
down my smoking (and getting a pack or two for helping Cliff out
with yard chores) I haven't had to stop quit yet; but I'm sure that
day is coming.The walking I've been doing lately is not part of
any exercise program. Back when Randy and I picked out this house,
we chose it because it was just a few blocks from Cliff and DO's
house. In actuality, their house is about 4.3 tenths of a mile from
my house. Just like I've been doing for the last few months now,
every other day or more, I make a trip up to their house, and either do yard
work, shampoo the carpets, run Cliff on errands, or take DO to the
doctor. With the car down, I walk there now, help out, visit a bit
(sometimes get a free lunch ), and then walk the half mile back
home. Although I still haven't gotten an iPod for any gift-receiving
holiday (hint, hint ), I throw some new Madonna, Prince, Pet Shop
Boys, or Nine Inch Nails on my old mp3 player, crank up the volume,
and head up the road. (I'd probably ride my bike; but it's rim is
badly bent, and biking up the hill to DO's with the brake constantly
on is NOT my idea of fun or exercise. ) |
Lately, with some warm
sunny Spring days around here, while Jim and I have been filling up
and cleaning the pool, I've also been reading several books. It only
took me a day to read the newest James Patterson book, "The 5th
Horseman". It's the latest book in a series of his about several
women (a lawyer, a reporter, a detective, a District Attorney) who as
friends and co-workers are involved in several murder cases
On another afternoon, I read through a book called "Marley and Me",
which has also been on the best seller list recently. This story is
by a journalist with a golden Labrador named Marley. I've always
been a sucker for dog stories. I spent many a Saturday morning as a
kid, watching matinee shows starring Lassie. The only bad things
about most dog stories is that for any good dog story, the ending is
always sad. The worst part of our symbiotic relationship with our
pets is that their life span is just no where near as long as ours,
nor even long enough if they must have shorter life spans than us.
Having lost so many of my kidz, you'd think I'd avoid being reminded
of that sadness. (Just like you're probably thinking now about some
of the pets that aren't with you anymore. ) But sometimes, I
like to remember the hurt. I use that sadness to remember all the
reasons that my pets were each so individually near and dear to me.
I get a nice little cry, and for a few days afterwards, nice
thoughts of Apple, or Hershey, or Sheagra (and the list goes on) go
drifting through my head. Boy, even with the pain, I'm so glad that
each one was a part of my life.  |
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Ah, but don't think because I've
strayed from my computer for a while to read in the sunshine, that
I'm neglecting Reznoir (that's my computer's name) . Oh no,
see Reznoir has a DVD player and I've gotten hooked on the FOX
series "24". Lucky for me , Tara has all the past seasons on
DVD and she has loaned me the first season. So when I come home
from hanging out by the pool (still way to cold to even think about
getting into that water ), I've been glued to my monitor watching
Jack Bauer go through a very long day as I watch through the TV
show. It took less than a week to get through the first season and I
can't wait to borrow season two. And I can't wait till next week to
see what happens in the current season. I just hope that I
can keep the seasons straight and not get the plots mixed up.  |
It's been kind of weird being able to
watch straight through a whole season of this show. Every episode is
very edgy and exciting, so some nights it's been hard going to
sleep, keyed up from watching a couple of episodes during the
evening and then wondering what was going to happen next. Then to
add to the edginess that I've been feeling from watching "24", Jim
and I rented a movie that really touched me and bothered me too. |
On a recent rainy evening of bad TV,
we decided to go rent a DVD. I've been really wanting to catch a
couple movies that I didn't have the money to go see in the
theaters. Years ago, over several Christmases, my grandmother got me
the whole set of "The Chronicles of Narnia". Having recently
re-read all of those books, I was anxious to see the movie; but all
the kids have that new release checked out, so we went with my
number two choice of "Brokeback Mountain". Hey, what can I say? It's
that "gay cowboy" movie, so of course I was going to see it
sometime. Oh, my gosh! What a really good and horribly sad
story. |
I can't really say why this movie
affected me, since the storyline isn't anything like my life. Set in
1963 (when I was just a year old), it's about two young guys working
in Wyoming herding sheep. During their long summer months together
with only one another, they turn into really close friends (if you
get my drift ).
Then the movie follows Jack and Ennis as they get together several
times through nearly the next 20 years. One of them would like them
to have a more permanent relationship; while the other has been too
scarred by his homophobic-rearing to even contemplate such a
situation. Although the movie plays slow, the scenery is gorgeous,
the musical soundtrack is quite haunting, and the guys aren't hard
on the eyes at all .
At first, I wasn't certain if I really liked the movie; but as the
characters grew on me, I found myself hoping some good fortune would
fall on these guys. I won't give away anymore; but gather any
conjecture you want when I say that by the end I was crying. The
sadness stayed with me for a few days, and I'm just now starting to
shake it off. |
Maybe watching this movie (and reading
the dog stories knowing the ending will be sad) just gets to me by
tapping into my own underlying sadness. You know, I usually try to
put a happy spin on the things (good and bad) that happen to me (so
I can get through them with my sanity in tact); but underneath that
is a depression that I've had to live with many years now. Even
though I have an incredibly wonderful relationship with Jim and a
house full of dogs that makes me very happy; I still have this
disease, most of my pets have passed away, and my Randy is gone. I'm
sure if I didn't have pack #2 of the dogs and my love, Jim, I would
have already been swamped by my grief years ago. Sometimes these
books and movies give me the opportunity to vent some of my sadness
without tearing me apart by reliving my own sad times. |
Should I suggest that you see this
movie? Sure. It's a really unique love story. Of course, the subject
matter is a little dicey (meaning that, although I love him, my dear
Republican brother, will not like this subject at all); but except
for some insinuated sex, if you can handle seeing some guys kiss a
couple of times, you ought to give this flick a watch and then let
me know what you thought of it. (If you're still uncertain, you can
read the original short story here. I was quite amazed at how, for a
change, this movie followed the story nearly exactly - with even the
same dialog in the movie as in the story.) |
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It seems I won't be seeing much of my
newest friend, Ella, this summer. Tara and the family are going
to be moving to Indiana for the summer! Ella's daddy, Jason,
repairs hail damage to cars and has traveled the country for years
working where the storms hit (except for the last two years, when
he's been with Tara). Recently severe storms hit, and Jason's old
company really needed him, so he headed out to work. |
At first, I was a little
disappointed in Jason. He and Tara have managed their money well
(actually it's all Tara's doing ), and they aren't in need of
money with the house and the car paid off. I was really sad to hear
that, so soon after her birth, Ella's dad was going away to work;
but I guess even though things are fine now, it really won't be all
that long until Tara and Jason are supporting two teenagers and
wondering how to pay for college. Luckily, Tara and Jason have
worked out a great solution! Instead of missing Ella's first few
months, Jason will be with his whole family, as Tara and the kids
are going to move to Indiana for the summer to be with Dad. I'm
sure going to miss them this summer; but Tara (who takes nearly as
many pictures as I do ) has promised to keep in touch
(thanks to the great Internet), and maybe even stop in a couple of
weekends throughout the summer.
I'm going to miss you Tara, Austin, Ella and Jason ; but hope
that you have a great time visiting a new city and state. Let me
know when you'll be coming back around and I'll make sure the pool
is clean and ready for a nice swim! |
Before closing this update, I want to
say Thank You once again to everyone
that has helped me in trying to keep my domain name and space.
Nearly halfway to the goal and with only a short time left, I'm
hoping that I will still be updating you on my life and all the
craziness for another year. I promise to bring you another update
soon to keep you apprised of how close we're getting to the goal!
Oh, and with a little luck ,
my next update just might have some flower pictures if my irises pop
out a few weeks sooner than they did last year.
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Week Two: |
With just a little dash of rain
recently, everything has been growing like gang-busters around here.
Just MouseOver this picture to see how fast the hollyhocks grew in
just two days. |
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It's looking like I'll have a bunch of
wild pink roses in my garden this week, as the transplanted rose
bush (from DO) is
doing really well. |
I've already had to mow
the lawn twice, and it took me three days to give the shrubs their
first Spring haircut. |
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I mentioned in my last update that the
irises would be appearing earlier this year, and it's still looking
like that prediction is going to come true. While it wasn't until
the last few days of May last year before these flowers bloomed,
buds are showing up on most of the stalks. As you can see below
within just a few days the first of the blooms will be bursting
forth. |
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The tiger lilies have already tripled
their size in just the last two weeks. It will still be a while
before these flowers are out. |
With Spring so much in the air, we can
hardly wait for Summer time so we can put the pool to use. After an
easy cleanup from the winter, the pool is crystal clear. |
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With the pool open now and
us looking forward to Summer, our thoughts turned to something I
mentioned back in January - Pooltag! Similar, yet different, to the
Redbull Flugtag that we attended a few years ago, our contest (to be
held in July probably) is to make a float with pop bottles and get
from one side of the pool to the other without sinking. |
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Jim works with some duct tape and Coke
bottles, trying to determine how best to "hook" the bottles
together. |
some preliminary prototypes |
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So far, our ideas seem to
be "holding water". The mini-float that Jim put together, really
floated. |
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The only other thing we needed to know
was if the float would actually hold us up. (It takes about 50
2-liter bottles to displace about 100 lbs. according to info I found on the net. Ain't the internet great? LOL
Anytime I want to know anything, I just "google" it up. WINK) Click
the picture to the right to see how the float managed on a trial
run. |
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Help save reigningpages.com
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Thank you again to everyone that has
already helped in my campaign to save my domain. The total is now up
to $140! Very soon I hope to hit that $150 mark ,
which is good since the deadline is fast approaching too. |
Thank You to the newest Contributors!
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Celia Johnson,
my Mom! |
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Carolynn Shambach,
Randy's mom,
my "mom-in-law" |
Jack Pickett,
childhood friend from my neighborhood in Charlotte |
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Jim Pollnow,
my partner in everything!  |
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And now, a confession of an obsession
that I've had for the last week - "Brokeback Mountain". I mentioned
it earlier this month after viewing the DVD, and it has stuck with
me since ("Brokeback got us good", to quote from the film). |
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After watching the movie
(and thanks to the internet again), I found the short story by Anne
Proulx and fell for the tale even harder. From there, it was a short
time until I had downloaded screenshots and music from the movie,
including even the audio book of the story and the original
screenplay. For days, the music and scenes have played over and over
in my head, as I wrapped my mind around the beautiful prose of the
story. |
I still can't really put
my finger on why this story has touched me so; but, at least, I
found out that I'm not the only one- there's a huge forum of people
talking about Brokeback. So in between listening to the story or the
music, and watching the movie (don't tell Jim that I've already
watched it 6 times! Oops, guess I just told him! ), I've
been reading through thousands of posts as other people try also to
come to grips with why this movie affected them. And what did I
learn? Lots! I've learned more about movie making (symbolism of
colors, juxapositioning of elements), short story writing, Roman and
Greek mythology, and musical composition, than I ever knew before. I
also learned, that although I've gotten this obsession with the
movie, I must not be too crazy, since there are plenty of others in
the same quandary as I am. |
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I guess in the end, I love this movie
because it IS about two gay guys. Unfortunately for them, in
the backwoods of America, in the early 60's, the fear of homophobia
was their cross to bear. This fear (of a very real truth) ruined
their lives and the lives of everyone around them. In the end, two
men simply being in love with one another was enough justification
for society for a world of hurt and pain. |
Fortunately for me, by the
time I came out in the early 80's, things had changed for the
better. Of course, homophobia still exists; but not enough that I
have had to hide my real self or my love. I've been able to freely love two men and
receive their love to me. I like to think that we are all the better
for this. Between you (my friends and family) and me, we don't have
those lies and half-truths, and so we are all better off without the
deception. I've been able to share with you the life I had with my
Randy (the good and the sad ) and the life that I'm having
with Jim (losing some of the sad, and getting the good back
into my life ). |
Even though I still
haven't gotten tired of "Brokeback Mountain" (it's up there
on my list now of favorite movies along with "The Wizard of Oz",
"Purple Rain", "A Nightmare before Christmas",
"Little Shop of Horrors", "Best Little Whorehouse in Texas"
and all the "Matrix" films. Hmm? Wonder what that list says
about my personality? ),
I'm trying to move on past the feelings that that story evoked. I'm listening to the latest music from
Madonna and Prince and anxiously awaiting the newest release of the
Pet Shop Boys. I've read through a trilogy of books (Stephen
Donaldson - "The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant the Unbeliever") and
have started reading another book by Anne Proulx (author of
"Brokeback Mountain"), whose other stories are as well written and
interesting as Brokeback. (Just looking at the TV listing for
Saturday (tomorrow afternoon) and not much is on. Maybe when I
finish this book up, I'll watch "Brokeback" just one more time.
) |
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Week Three: |
reigningpages.com is saved!
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Thank you again to everyone that has
already helped in my campaign to save my domain. Thanks to all your
help, we collected enough money to cover my domain costs (for the
space and the name) for another year. I almost ran into another
problem though after your contributions had come through. No credit
card on hand to use to pay the fee.
But when you're down and out, a mom will always come to the rescue,
so my Mom helped me complete the transaction. 
I hope you all enjoy the next year's worth of fun festivities, crazy
pictures, ramblings and rantings. 
Remember: If you don't like the content, you have no one to blame
but yourselves.  |
Thank You to the latest Contributors!
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Celia Johnson,
my Mom! |
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Jon, Lisa, Jonathan, Jenny,
and Jackson Bivens |
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Since you paid for this
site, then I guess I best get on with giving you your money's worth.  |
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CloseUps
of the first of the Irises |
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The irises on the other
side of the fountain are coming along now too. I'm guessing I'll be
seeing flowers on those stalks by the end of next week.
On a related note, the small purple irises up at DO's are budding up
now too. As soon as all this rain moves out of the area, I hope the
sun will bring those irises out. |
The rose bush is growing quite well
Look at the difference in the last 2 months! |
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Zeusie peeks around to watch
me taking pictures of the bamboo. As you can tell, it's really
taking off this year. I planted it about 3 years ago hoping to grow
a wind-break by the back door. Gusts of wind and the dogs have
nearly ripped it off it's hinges several times through the years.  |
More
cute puppies to "oh" and "ah" about |
Trent (who is Carolynn's
son and Randy's brother, you know, the one with the Dairy Queen
store ) recently got a couple of new additions to his house. I
bet they are a handful! TWO handfuls Sorry, I don't know
their names yet. (Trent, you'll have to email me and let me know.
) |
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Now that I've shown you some pictures
worth a thousand words, I'll give you my $.02 worth in just over a
thousand words. I told you that I'd give you your money's worth!  |
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I just finished up the latest short story book by Anne Proulx ("Bad Dirt:
Wyoming Stories 2", a follow up to "Closer Range: Wyoming Stories",
the one with the "Brokeback Mountain" short story) and enjoyed it. Actually, I would recommend this short story book for the simple fact that as I read the last few paragraphs and closed the cover, I was laughing. Some of these tales from Wyoming were a little sad; some odd. I was hooked by the end of the first story, and the humor at the end of the book clinched the deal.
Speaking of Anne Proulx, I'm going to try to only bring up the "Brokeback Mountain" movie one last time. Jim wasn't nearly as impressed with film as I was; but then again, I think it's because of where my life has been. The movie is a terribly sad love story at the heart.
As a kid and student, I was a huge reader (of everything but biographies, which I finally started reading later on) and always involved in some sort of Speech class, contest, or Drama
affiliated course. Why lookie! Here's a picture of me in college, as "Snub, a joiner" from Shakespeare's "A Midsummer Night's Dream".

(MouseOver to see where I am on stage.
Go read the play or watch the movie to see I'm in this costume )
So I've always been interested in the under-pining of books and movies - the "how?" and "why?" the authors and directors do what they do to evoke feelings from their audiences. (I've even thought about myself
as an author, but the right idea just has never hit me.) Often wearing my own emotions on my sleeve, I've cried or laughed when those feeling have been invoked in me by a book or movie. I just bawled when I thought ET was dead, and when Charlotte was dead after spinning all those webs to help Wilbur. Over and over, I've quit watching ER for months at a time because I felt it was just too silly to be crying over a TV show. The ONLY time I ever read in bed with a flashlight, I got caught because "Amityville Horror" was so scary I yelled and threw the book across the room.
So that's why I think this movie has intrigued me so much. There are so many layers to it. So many feelings. Feelings like I've already felt. For a long time here, I was kind of like Ennis without Jack (at the end of "Brokeback") - pretty damned miserable. It seemed all I had were my memories and a faded leather jacket hanging in the closet. For nearly 10 years, even with the friendship of Jim, I was a grieving widower. Still am some days. I think this movie just dredged some of those feelings back up. Ah, it's not the first time like THAT has happened either; but, with Jim thankfully, I haven't had to feel those feelings in a quite while.
It's been kind of a weird life, having been so happy with Randy; then so sad without him. You know, during those years, I was having to deal with issue of my own mortality too. Jim was a very good friend with Randy and I, and remained so. Many times he kept me from wallowing in my grief by just letting me be the "third wheel" hanging around with him and his boyfriend "du jour". Time passed, I got better (physically and emotionally), and my friendship with Jim only deepened. Even though we were so close, I still put him off for a few years before "officially" claiming to be his boyfriend. Part of me was still clinging to what I had (with Randy) and what I have (this damned disease). Up until I was 30, I had been a pretty happy bloke; but after that, I used to think the worst part of being sick was the damned depression. Sometimes it just smothers me.
Jim isn't Randy; but in many ways they are the same. Jim thinks it's odd whenever we finish one another's sentences or call at the same time. Randy and I were just like that. Heck, to me that's like sliding one of my old leather jackets back on - it fits. So now I'm at a point in life, trying to reconcile those feelings of loss that I carried so long with actually being happy again. Do I feel that I'm letting Randy down? On the contrary. That's where my emotions diverge from what the movie made me feel. Randy did right by me, and I did right by him. I wasn't left wondering what I could have done different or better; but wondering why FATE couldn't have been better to us. Does this mean that my feelings died then with Randy? Of course not. They just got smothered for a while. I've always liked to think that as long as one of us is still alive, our love still abides too. It won't be till I'm gone that the "Randy and Michael" saga truly is over.
Now for the twist - falling in love again. I guess I should have known that it could happen. Look at how many dogs I've loved and lost, and then gotten the next dog and loved it too. Gabby doesn't replace Apple; but I love them both dearly. So there Jim was, standing by me through many sad, hard and sick years. Years in which I was so sick that I thought I'd soon be re-united with Randy.
Thankfully those years are past. These damned meds that I hate taking so much have made me better and have let me even begin to dream of a "future". I still don't look far into the future; but I've learned I can't afford to squander the time that I do have. So rather than looking back in grief so much, I look forward to the time I spend with Jim. He's smart, affable, witty, and not bad on the eyes. A real man that I can lean on in the times when I'm tired, sick, or suffering from my emotional damage. A man that I love for being who he is and loves me for being who I am. I can only hope to be able to give him the same amount of time and love that Randy gave me.
So after a week of of being "smothered" again, I'm really shaking off this
bout of depression and ready to move on in the "Jim and Michael" saga. (Didn't I just say something about not wasting the
time I have?) I'm going to go get more pictures of the irises
popping out, find out what the doctor has to say on Thurs., hope that it doesn't
rain for a while so I can mow the grass, and start working on a couple of ideas
for my Pooltag floats.
There's probably only about two months until the big event. Stay tuned for more
details! 
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A quick update on our
friends who are out of town for the summer - Tara and her clan.
Wouldn't you know it, the only thing that they forgot to
pack was the computer! But Tara would be lost without her
access to the Internet, so the computer got shipped to them ASAP
I chatted on the phone with Tara for a while the other day.
So far, they really seem to be enjoying exploring the new city. |
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I swear Ella is already
getting bigger
and I know there's
more hair on her head too.  |
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Week Four: |
As this week begins, things
are looking pretty good. The weather is slowing improving (it's
been nearly nothing but rain for two weeks and chilly), all over
town flowers are blooming, and I got good news from the latest visit
to the doctor. (You have to see some flower pictures before I tell
you about the doctor visit. ) |
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I cut the first iris to
bloom (the purple "Sweet Reflection") and gave that to DO after
borrowing her car to run some errands the other day (my car is still
out back, broken down, with dead plates). The second iris to bloom is
this peach "Happy Birthday" variety. |
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All the patches of irises
in the front yard (around the fountain) are forming a ton of buds!
It will be a while before I see many flowers in the backyard; but
things are growing up well in the meantime |
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the mint |
morning glories and day lilies |
The bird house/yard cam that we built
in June 2004 is starting to show some wear and tear. I'll have to wait till
later to take it down and fix it up, since there's a family of birds
living in there right now. |
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The cosmos are loving this rain! I may
have to go scatter a few more seeds in those blank spots though. I
think I'll wait another week to do that so that I can keep the bed
flowering a little longer into the Fall. |
Wow! I said it a while ago and I have
to say it again (especially after I was on such a downer a few weeks
ago); but being in love again is GOOD! The latest blood work
results should prove that, since they aren't too bad. The Viral
Load went down from 561 to 93. It's not quite "undetectable"; but
it's nearly there! My T-cells took a small drop though, from 264 to
217. The doctor thinks the drop is just a fluke; but just to be
sure, within a month, we're going to have more blood work done. |
Current Graph of my
VL and TC
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Did you ever wonder just what these
numbers and lines are supposed to mean?
Click on the chart for a popup window for the explanations.  |
Thinking about the trip to the doctor
brings a thought to my mind. |
Once again, I realize how lucky I
really must be. With
all the problems that I've had with HIV (and boy, I don't think I've
had it bad at all compared with some of the tales I read online), I
keep my (fairly) happy outlook because I'm just so amazed to still
even be alive. The doctor was explaining to his newest student that
normally when a T-cell count is less than 200, they prescribe
Bactrim (an antibiotic) as a prophylaxis against pneumonia
(especially PCP, like I had the first time). My doctor has had me
continue taking this med, even when my counts have risen, since they
haven't gone up very much more than that (nor have they stayed up
much through the years). I told them that I have ALWAYS stayed on
that med, no matter what, since the last thing I will ever want is
another bout of pneumonia. I heard the tinge of alarm in the
doctor's voice, as he asked when I had hospitalized for PCP. (It was
while I was under the care of the last doctor, so it was in his
notes, but not really in his head about my case.) I also noticed
lines of concern crease Jim's face, as he listened to the doctor
explaining how the meds that I am taking are considered a "salvage
routine". That means I've been on a lot of these meds which I
haven't been able to tolerate or have become immune too, so the
medicinal choices are very limited. The
current regime of meds is, in actuality, just the best mix of drugs
that he can come up for me after having the disease this long and
having been on so many meds. There are several other meds with much
more success that he would prefer to prescribe; but most of those
were so harsh on me that the cure was worse than the disease. Yet
even with all that, here it is, years later, and I'm still hanging
in there. Wow!  |
Everyday now,
more irises are blooming! |
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Some
CloseUp Blooms |
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Most of the times when I'm
taking pictures to show you here, I'm just snapping pictures; but
sometimes, I try to be just a little bit better of a photographer
and get a GOOD picture. With the irises coming out so nicely, below
is a shot that I really tried to give some nice composition. I don't
know about you, but I sure like having these kinds of pictures
around about January. There are always pictures of the pool and
my flowers on my monitors (remember? I have 4 monitors here to put
some pictures on. ) during those horrible Winter months. If
you'd like this picture for your desktop wallpaper, right-click and
Save As (then put it with your other wallpapers. You do have
a folder for those, right? I have several HUGE folders of
wallpapers ranging from movie screencaps (right now I've still got
pix from Brokeback on my screen but I may switch to some
Underworld 2: Evolution pictures soon - that's a great vampire
movie!); through the colors (red, blue, green, black&white, etc)
with all sorts of images; a holiday folder; a folder of fine arts
from true classics like
Sir Lawrence
Alma-Tadema to new classics like Kinkaid; and, oh yes, there are
some folders of naked men pictures too. 
(But I NEVER
have those on my screen when company is over. Thank goodness, I
don't get many visitors, the dogs couldn't care less, and Jim
doesn't mind the occasional "eye candy". )
(Don't forget now. Save this picture for your desktop. ) |
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Another interesting thing
to mention while we're talking about plants (forget the naked men
wallpaper and think about all those pretty flower pictures I just
showed you. ) remember last year when I planted at Expert Auto?
Well, this year is showing some results! I still don't see any
cosmos out front; but the hollyhocks by the front bay are HUGE. I
got a call the other day from Mark to help him get a new computer
set up in the shop (replacing his aging machine). I totally forgot
to take any pictures though. (Just ask Jim about me and
"forgetting". If my head wasn't attached, I'm sure I'd lose it
somewhere. You just don't know how many times I've left the house,
driven around the block and come back to retrieve something that I
forgot. ) BUT, I'll have to go back
soon
(to install Office, and burn a CD of photos), and I'll remember to get
a pix. You just won't believe how big those hollyhocks are. I can't wait
to see how they bloom.  |
Until then, it's back to
some reading for me. I finished up "That Old Ace in the Hole"
by Annie Proulx and started on another one of her books, "Accordion
Crimes". Don't worry though, she's not the only author in my
stack of "To Read" books. I've got to read the latest Alex Cross
novel ("Mary, Mary") by James Patterson, with his two newest
novels coming as soon as DO finishes them. There's also Book One and
Book Two in the second trilogy of "Thomas Covenant the Unbeliever".
With the upcoming weather finally turning sunny, and the temp going
up near 80; although the pool is too cold yet, I can still start
working on my tan beside the pool while reading through these
books. |
I was starting to worry about Tara over
there in Indiana since it had been nearly a week since we last
talked; but I chatted with her online and I'm not worrying anymore.
Things really are going pretty well for T's family. Jason has been
busy working, while Tara has been busy being Mommy. (According to
Ella, the only thing Tara is good for right now is breakfast, lunch
and dinner. ) Tara and the kids have been out exploring the city
and stopped by the zoo. I don't know who's checking out who the most
in these pictures she sent me - Austin checking out the walrus, or
the walrus checking out Austin.  |
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Because I've still been walking up to
DO's a lot (just not as much during the rainy season that we just
went through), I thought of something else I could tell you about
(YOU did pay for the site, so I'm just trying to do right by you
). During those walks (only about 5 minutes if I really move it), I've
always got on my sunglasses and headphones. On the mp3 player is
what I should mention - the music! |
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Boy, for me, this has been a really
good year in music. First a new CD from Nine Inch Nails (with
teeth) , then Madonna (Confessions on a Dancefloor),
followed by Prince (3121), and now the newest from the
Pet Shop Boys (Fundamental).
I can only fit 128 mb on this good old Intel mp3 player that I've
had for probably about 4 years now, so no way does ALL that fit. LOL
So it's always some crazy mix of all of the above new CDs. |
Throw in the soundtrack to
Brokeback Mountain, Rent, Phantom
of the Opera and Best Little Whorehouse in Texas;
along with some Patsy Cline and Elvis that I recently
downloaded (Oh lord! That gay cowboy movie is giving me flashbacks
to that country music from my Southern heritage that I have eschewed
for more progressive electronic sounds!
), and you'll know
what my playlist has been lately. |
While most of this month has been a
little chilly and a lot wet, things are gradually improving; but to
get the improvement, we had to go through some serious
thunderstorms. Although they reported hail just up the highway at
the airport, we didn't see any here. (No need to come back to town
yet, Jason. I don't think there was enough hail damage done to the
cars around here. ) The weather forecasters say that after this
front pushes on through, we'll be sunny and up in the 80's
(finally!) for the holiday weekend.  |
Even though the storms around my house
weren't worth taking any pictures of, I thought I should mention the
storms for the odd coincidence that they are. Carolynn and I have
noticed that for the last 12 yrs., it has always rained on
May 25th. How well I remember that night, back in 1994. Sometimes it seems so far
in the past, and sometimes like it was just days ago. That night was so
very muggy. The kind of muggy where everything (your
clothes, the drapes, the carpet) all feel damp. During the night, as
I stayed up with Randy during his few remaining hours, a
thunderstorm rumbled through, doing nothing to relieve the humidity.
Afterwards, a thick fog blanketed the area, and the interior of my
house, in an eerie silence. Without the thunder and after having
been awake for nearly three days, I laid down to doze for just a
while. Too soon, I was awakened, to tell Randy goodbye, as the sun
began to rise, sweeping away the last of the clouds from that sad night. |
Well, now that I (and
maybe you) have had a good cry, we should move back to the present.
Although we all still love and miss Randy, we have all moved on. In
2006, I have 4 wonderful dogz and one great boyfriend. Today, being
Jim's regular day off, I spent the whole day with him and had a nice
time. Nope, we didn't do anything special. It was enough just being
together.  |
Joxer and Zeus have a play day!
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Gabby was probably miffed at us; but
she's been on so many car rides lately, that we left her at the
house with Aires, and lucky Joxer and Zeus got to go for a ride and
a fun time today.
Just like his sister, Joxie really likes to hang out the window, as
you can see here. I just have to laugh watching those ears and jowl
flap in the wind.  |
Joxer and Zeus both LOVE playing with toys, so Jim's backyard is a great place for them.  |
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"Quit taking pictures, mIkIE,
and play Frisbee with me!"
- Joxer |
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Two hands, two toys, two dogs.
Just the right amount for a lot of fun! |
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I swear! Everyone of these dogs has the
longest tongues. I think it's a trait passed down through their
grandmother, EightBall. |
Who's this cutie? Oh, that's me.  |
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Zeus is enjoying the back-scratching
that I'm giving him |
Click this picture
to watch a video of
Twirling Dogs |
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The boyz had a good time and finally sprawled out in the shade to
rest |
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Week Five: |
My favorite time of year
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Well, that's about it for the month of
May. Now it's Sunday on Memorial Day weekend, and I finally finished
up the Annie Proulx book "Accordion Crimes" - all about the
200 yrs. worth of owners of a little green accordion. (Her books are
really good; but deep. Not "fast reads", they are the kind that you
have to take slowly and think about while reading.) Later this
afternoon, I'll be heading up to DO and Cliff's for a Memorial Day
cookout to officially start off the Summer. WooHoo! Even
though I've become pretty acclimated to this weather up here, Summer
(with all it's heat and sunshine ) is still my favorite season.
Jim hooked up the solar heater to the pool this morning, and with
the next couple of days with sunshine and highs in the 80's, there's
a definite chance that we'll be splashing about soon. I think I'll
grab the newest James Patterson book, "Mary, Mary" (a new Detective
Alex Cross story that will be much easier to read than that last
book ), to read by the pool while soaking up some vitamin D.  |
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